Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Goodbye, the beatiful, shiny, deadly stars

I would have never imagined this fateful relationship would go this far, be this deadly, this costly, and this detrimental to me, myself, and my dearest friends and family. I would have never imagine it would come to this, that is the physical and geographical separation from you, albeit still mentally attached. How did it come to this? How could it come to this? I don't know, and I will probably never know, since what have happened were all done unconsciously and unintentionally. I would have never imagined it would be this strong, this compulsive, even after when you said NO. I guess this is what it would normally occur when someone started this late in life, without experience and with a world passing him by in a blink of an eye.

You are truly the beautiful, shiny, and deadly stars. You are truly the Yun Xing (雲星 in Chinese calligraphy.) One which is out of the grasp of many dreamers, admirers, and potential lovers. One which strives toward her destiny without any obstruction, by any means, irrespective of from any entity. The battle has long been lost, and, for me, it is just on the tip of an ice berg before everything falls apart. No one will hear my pain, my suffering, and my turmoil. The devastation which I had to go through, and the forever abyss which I'm falling toward. I told you I'll deteriorate and disintegrate for just you. I think I've achieved that. My dream, and that of countless others, has shattered; those pieces of which are unrecoverable and undeniably broken. What is life without hope and dream? What is life without friends and family?

We are all human beings. The needs of whom are unsatisfiable, are lust, are desire, are fortune, are unattainable goals. Hear me, God! Give me strength, and strip me away of the negativity in both I and the deadly stars. May there be unison and cohesiveness between us in the next life, if not for the impending future!

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